Rooftop Sunsets & Cocktails by Alexa Fernandaz

Rooftop Sunsets & Cocktails

Desiree Lockhart is a 24-year-old woman who is trying to make her dreams come true in the Big Apple. Growing up in a suburb in New Jersey, she had always dreamed of becoming an actress and decided to move to NYC to try to make it happen. However, things do not always go as planned.

She was now newly single following a few mistakes that she made that caused Seth, her fiancée to break their engagement. In the beginning of the book, Desiree is somewhat obsessive over that the fact that her and Seth are no longer together. Despite her two best friends wishes, she is constantly looking that old pictures and even Facebook stalking the new girlfriend.

By her side are George, a twenty-nine year old doctor and Olivia who is a singer and happens to also be Desiree’s landlord. Throughout the book, we go all the around the city with them as they learn and find themselves along the way.

This book is classified as contemporary romance. However it is not really lovey-dovey until the very main end of the book. It doesn’t timeline the friends sexual encounters or anything like that. It is a fairly “clean” book as well.

Plot was a big issue in this book. While reading, you wonder if there is ever going to be a resolution or reasoning to everything. It switches gears in the middle and changes tone completely.

Once you arrive at the ending, which to me was the most interesting part of the whole book, it was over. I wanted it to go on and show more into the future. In all honesty, I felt that the ending should have really been somewhere around the middle.

The characters were pretty true to their ages, they are all really young and when you are in your twenties, you are still learning who you are as a person. Essentially, that is what this book is all about it making mistakes and learning to use them to grow.

There were formatting issues in this book. I read it on Kindle and there were random page breaks, on page 39 for example. The page breaks right in the middle of the sentence. Also there were moments when the characters would be in conversation and the author did not make a new form the new person speaking, so the dialogue was in the same paragraph and it made it somewhat confusing.

Another thing that knock off points for me was the fact that in the very beginning the author switched back and forth between writing number in numerical form and then the next page they would be in word form.

All in all, I believe I would rate this as a 3 1/2 out of 5 stars. It was an okay read, but it will not be a repeat read for me.

If you wish to check it out, above is the hyperlink. It is a Kindle Unlimited read, so if you are a subscriber, you can check it out and form your own opinions about it. Let me know what you think!

Until the next book!!

~Mommy Reads Books A.K.A Laura~

 

Fall Back Skyward by Autumn Grey

Fall Back Skyward by Autumn Grey

Hi everyone!! Book review time finally! Before we get to that I am going to update you a bit. Last night I had an idea to go video blogs and I fully intended on do so, however, with my shyness and lack of memory on my phone, maybe that’s not a good idea.

Anyways back to the topic at hand here. I just completed Fall Back Skyward by Autumn Grey.It is a contemporary romance novel and according to Amazon is has 422 pages.

It tells the story of Nor and Cole, their past and present. So if you don’t enjoy flash backs, this may not be for you. It also alternates point of views between the two and then you will get a surprise point of view in chapter 52. It’s really strange and I don’t to give it away but it will leave you wondering what the author was thinking.

By reading the synopsis, we learn that Cole and Eleanor (Nor) were in love with each other. Cole was a saving grace for Nor and she was his world, or his “Sun”. However, there was a horrible event that sent Cole away and when he finally gets back to her, he gets there just in time to watch her walk down the aisle to another man, who just so happens to be his very own brother.

Nine years pass and Cole is standing in his apartment with an several envelopes that have the word “URGENT” written in red. And no, this wasn’t an unpaid bills, but what was inside changed his life forever.

I really enjoyed this book. There is a lot of drama going on. There were things that I didn’t enjoy and some things, in my mind were left unfinished at the end. This is a series, so that may be why I felt that. Maybe the loose ends will tie up in the next book.

I give this book 4 out of 5 stars. This is because there was a small typo in chapter 38, also like I mentioned earlier, the very strange point of view change in chapter 52.

This book does contain explicit language and adult situations that include sexual content and mentions of self harm. If you have triggers to self harm, I would avoid the book.

The characters in this book are pretty well-developed. There were things about certain people such as Nor’s mother, that I would have liked to have known more about. I don’t want to give too much away, but once you dive into the book, I feel like you also will have questions.

All in all, I really liked the book. I will most likely continue on with the series just to see how the author is going to work the following books in the series. I think I have an idea as to what will happen, but we will just have to wait and see.

If you want to check it out, you can click the hyperlink above and it will take you to the Amazon page. This book is a part of Kindle Unlimited, so if you are a subscriber to that, this is one you don’t want to miss.

That’s it for now! Until the next book!

To Vlog or not to Vlog

I have been having an internal debate over Vlogging. 

I would like to do my book review portion a little differently. My one issue is my very Country accent. 

I have a very nasally Southern voice and people can be so mean, I am not sure I can handle the torment. 😂😂

I am going to sleep on it and decide officially tomorrow! 

Digital Book VS Actual Book?

I have been an avid reader since my childhood. I remember going to the library and picking out Judy Blume and other various children’s book. Of course, that was in the 90s when people actually read hardback/paperback books.

Today, children have always had technology. Thus the debate, digital book or actual book?

I discovered digital books in 2010, when I obtained my own Kindle from Amazon. It went with me to work, on trips, to college, everywhere. Since, I have preferred reading from some sort of device, whether it be Kindle or the Kindle or iBooks app on my cell phone.unnamed

I am sure a lot of the Bookish population of the world just gasped. A lot of people are saying “How can you say you a book lover when you don’t read actual books?”

My opinion is that digital is just so much easier to carry! I mean, I always have my cellphone, therefore, I will never be without something to read. With an actual books, you will forget at home or in your car and then how will you know if Kiera is going to finally break up with Denny for Kellan?

Convenience is the key! I even read the bible on my phone. It’s the same concept. Why would I want to lug around an actual Bible when I can get it pulled up on my phone with a few touches of your fingers.

What about you? Are you a book person or a digital book person?

Anixety/Depression and the whole shebang.

Anxiety and depression is no joke! Having both, it is like living in a cave. I just recently crossed over to the medicated side of life and honestly you don’t realize how bad off you were until you are medicated.

Before, I did not realize how depressed I was. When my doctor asked me if I had depression, I told her “I don’t think so” and boy I was in denial. Today my husband commented on how happy I seemed. I truly am. I feel like my life is finally MY life. I am not hiding any more.

I have came across people who say they don’t believe that anxiety and depression is real. They say that people only want attention. Let me tell you, I want anything but attention. I just want to live my life to the fullest. I hate that I let it go as far as I did.

It was so bad that I would be on lunch at work, in my car having a panic attack. It felt like I had a ton of bricks just sitting on my lungs. Trying to go back inside of the building after an hour and pretending everything was well was not an easy task.

As a child, I remember having panic attacks and having high anxiety about social interactions. However, the depression, didn’t hit until I had post partum depression. I remember how happy with life I was prior to having PPD and then after it was a turning point of sorts.

Once my husband became sick and was diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure, that’s when I knew I had to get help. Everything hit me all at once and the stress of his illness, work, and motherhood was just too much to bear.

If you are suffering, please know that you are not alone in this. There are millions of people just like you, that are most likely hiding the fact they are going through this internal battle. Also, there is help out there and it is okay to have to go to that. If you are truly suffering, trust me, it will change your life!

 

 

Coal Country over NYC

Before I tell you where I am going, let me tell you where I am. Every one knows all about The Big Apple, but do you know about Pike County, Kentucky?

Pike County, Kentucky is the east most county in the state. We boarder both West Virginia and Virginia and  are nestled in the heart of the Appalachian Mountains.There are about 65,000 people in this town so we are still large enough to were you don’t know everyone, but you feel like you do.

If by chance you have heard about my small town, the words redneck, hillbilly, Mountain Dew mouth and coal probably run through you mind. I have to say, I have been from here to Phoenix Arizona and I have discovered that it seems like redneck, hillbilly and bad teeth are not just in our little town, but every where. We have a bad name, but don’t judge it until you have been here and lived to tell about it.

Coal is a big deal in this area. It is what we are known for and it’s how a lot of us make a living. In recent years, a lot of mining companies have closed down the shafts. Closing down the mines are literally turning towns like mine into ghost towns. I mean you have to go where the work is.

I am not familiar about other places, but Pike County is rising up. We have built shopping centers and restaurants to bring jobs, as well as currently we are in the process of building a ophthalmology school and a distillery to bring more people and jobs back into our town.

Today, there is always something fun to do. Friday nights bring Main Street Live, which is where local bands come out and play right on Main Street. Once a month, in the warmer months, there is a car show, drag races and burn out. Also, we have the Expo Center, that holds concerts, shows and events.

Growing up, I felt trapped here. I was busting at the seams. I couldn’t wait until I could make the first break across the county lines into a larger city such as Lexington. But now, as an adult, I know I could never call any other place, “home”.

I love this town. The majority of my family lives within the county. Not to mention this place is beautiful. You can look out any window and see the Appalachian Mountains. It is safe and it gives me so much pride to say “I’m from Pikeville, Kentucky”.

 

I am the one!

Sunday came, Thank God. We went to the new church and it was an eye opener! Holy cannoli! I thought that I was going to be really nervous, but when we arrived it was just like calmness settled over me. We walked in and there were so many people that we both knew. We were given the “VIP” treatment, which included information about the church and activities there, a tour, and we were seated.

I have to tell you, once everything got moving, the music and baptisms and the service, the Holy Spirit was in the building. I have never in my life felt it as much as I did there. Everything was so moving that we both had tears in our eyes.

The sermon really lit my fire. The pastor preached about the story in Luke15:1-7 were Jesus tells a story about a shepherd who had 100 sheep. He counted them and there were only 99 in the field. The shepherd goes and looks for the one sheep. Even though he has 99 in the field that one is so important to him that he goes and searches and searches until he finds it and he rejoices when he did. The sheep is us and the Shepherd is of course Jesus.

He is always looking for you. No matter what you have done in life, no matter how low you sink into the mud, he searches and when he finds you, he and the angels rejoice in your salvation.

That hit me. Because no matter how much I have messed up in my life, Jesus is still here. He looked for me and found me and he has picked me up and saved me.

Let me just say that is has almost been three days and my soul is still on fire. A person from the church reached out to me today asking if we wanted to take any next steps. I explained to her that we have been saved, but we want to grow and to learn. They have a program there called “Life Group” and there are many small groups that meet and do a bible study together and the lady that reached out to me is actually going to help me join into a life group.

I am so excited to be a part of this. I can’t wait to learn and grown and to become a servant of God. I want to learn how to stop living my life the way I want to and start living the way God wants me to. I really hope and pray that this will be the church home for us and the one where we both belong.

Uncovering the truth

I know that I am a new blogger, so I know there are a lot of things that you don’t know about me.I am a sinner. We all are of course, but I think I am the worst kind. Hypocritical even.

You see, three years ago on August 4th 2013, I was baptized. I accepted the Lord into my heart and my life. My husband did the same, we were very newly married. We became members of the church that he had grow up in. I, myself, did not really grow up in a church. I went a few times here and there with my grandmother, but my parents did not and still do not go.

At first, things were great. We went on Sunday mornings and I went to bible study on Wednesday evenings.In my car, I would listen to Christian radio and sermons.I was living life right. I was doing really good, trying to learn and read the bible. But then things began to change. I had given birth to my 3 pound miracle and we missed quite a bit of church because I was “that” mom. The one that isolated her family to keep the germs away from her newborn preemies lungs.

Once we did return to services, I usually was rocking the unwashed pony tail and flip flops look. We would walk in and I would feel their eyes on me. I would be tired from staying up all night because the little princess had colic for the first five months of her life. The bags under my eyes were gigantic. I would barely get foundation on my face to hide them. My toenail paint was chipped away, I only got five minutes to myself I usually used that time to shower. So you can imagine what a sight I was walking into the church and add in post partum depression and I was a hot mess.

I felt that they were looking at me and saying “Oh wow, she looks horrible” “can you believe she wore that” “it looks like she hasn’t washed her hair in weeks” “They have missed the last ten sundays, why are they even here”. I felt judged. I felt unwanted and poor.

I was a new Christian, I still am. I wasn’t involve in church activities, I wasn’t asked to be. I began making up excused not to attend services until eventually we stopped going all together. We would make an appearence here and there, but the majority of the time we did not go.

Within this time, I began into my old ways. Gossiping at work, making fun of people, being just as judgemet to people as I thought they were to me. Cussing. The whole nine yards. I fell back down the rabbit hole.

I still believe in Christ. The fire still burns inside of me, but its more toward the back burner now. I feel guilty. I want to live like Jesus. I want to follow his words. I want to be involved in missonary work. I want to belong to a church were I will meet new people and feel like they want me there. I want to do Christ like things. I want to be someone that a nonbeliever looks at and say “Man, there is a light shining from her”

I had been feeling that maybe in my town there is another church that would accept me and help mold me into a real Christian. A good one, not a hypocrite.

So, in the past there was a lady at work that had invited myself and a friend to her church. I had somewhat told her about my past church experience and told her that I have heard about her church. They are doing great things in this town. She invited us, but the invitation fell on deaf ears at that time.  Well, Wednesday at work she came over to us and she ask if we had gave any thought on joining her for a church service. She handed us each a card that says “Impact Sunday”.

She told us that this Sunday, they are wanting to make impacts on peoples lives. People like me. I felt convicted. God seems to be telling me in my heart that I need to go. Being the anixous person that I am, I began to do research. I know a lot of people that belong to that perticular church, so I began Facebook snooping to kind of get the feel of what I will be walking into on Sunday. The church also has a Facebook, as well as an app and an old youtube channel. I have started listening to past sermons. This church is nondemoniational and I am not really familiar with what type of preaching they do so I was curious.

I listened to the past two Sundays sermons and I learnt something. In my county, there are 44,391 people from the 2010 cenus that state they do not go to church. Both of the last sermons talk about this and how strange it was that it ends with a one. The purpose of this “Impact Sunday” is to reach out to one person in your life. One person you want to save and want join you in heaven. I began thinking “Wow, out of all the people this lady must know, she asked me to join her” It makes me feel special to know that she wants to help me.

Tomorrow is the big day. Impact Sunday and it happens to be 2 days after my birthday (yes my birthday was yesterday) and it is also Septemeber 11th. I can’t wait to go. I hope and I pray that this will end up being my families new church home. If you want to pray for me, I would greatly appericate that.

To the love of my life,

It’s 3 AM and I’m awake. I can’t help but to lay here and watch you sleep in the glow of the night.

Your hair all a mess, your long eyelashes and pursed lips. A scab on your right arm from where you have scratched it. 

When I see you sleeping all I can think about is how perfect you are. How was I blessed to be your Mommy? 

I wish I could freeze time and keep you two years old. Everyday you learn a new word. Everyday you learn something new about this world. 

God, how I pray for you. I pray that you are happy and will always be. I pray that you will grow and learn and be smart. I pray for your future. For when you are grown and don’t need me as much. I pray for the times I have to be apart from you. How I wish I could be a stay at home mom. I pray for your safety and your health. 

I watch you laying next to me and watch your chest rise and fall with each breath. I recall a time when I wondered if you be able to breath on your own at all when you were in the NICU. Back then, when you were so small and so sick, I wondered if we would make it this far and I am so blessed we have. 

I know I gave birth to you, but you were the one who gave me life. The day you entered into this world was the first day my eyes were truly open.I learnt what love was on that day.Who knew it was possible to love this much? 

There isn’t a second that goes by that you are not on my mind. I wish I could slow down time so you can be little and stay in my arms forever.

There is going to come a day were you won’t want Mommy to hold you. A day is coming that you will be too big for me to pick you up and carry you. To hold you against my chest when you cry. One day, when you are a teenager we are going to fight and you are going to tell me you hate me because I won’t let you wear red lipstick, dye your hair purple or go out with your friends. I am not sure my heart can take it.

I want cherish all the moments we have together. All of the hugs and kisses. I want to remember everytime we cuddle and every time you giggle and smile. I wish there was a way to save every single memory with you in my mind, so that years from now, I can look back and remember everything. How it felt to watch you grow. 

Tonight before bed, I read to you. We read Dr. Seuss. We played on the couch, Mommy and Daddy pretending to be monkeys to make you smile and giggle. We tickled you and kissed you. 

Sometimes, I wonder if we are doing this parenting thing right. There are days were I feel like a failure over the little things. Like tonight, you feel asleep before we brushed your teeth. I feel like I should always remember things like that. 

If there’s one thing I hope I do right, it’s I hope you never have to wonder if your Mommy loves you. I hope you will grow up and look back and think, “Wow, Mom worked so hard for me and she loved me more than anything.”

No matter how hard life gets or how hard we are struggling, I hope we will always put you first and get you all you need. I pray we can give you the best life and childhood possible. Love you more than you know, 

Mommy